Saturday, December 30, 2006

dream

It's 3:15 in the morning.

I awoke from a dream in which I saw my father again.

I was on my knees tending a garden at my grandmother's house. Except it wasn't his mom's house; it was my mom's mom's house. But my grandma (his mom) was inside. We were both waiting anxiously because we knew he was going to arrive. There was snow all around the exposed patch of earth that I was working.

Dad pulled into the driveway in his truck, the early-70s gold model. He glanced over at me and then stared at the steering wheel, obviously overcome with emotion.

I made my way to the car, feeling choked up, too, but also very excited and happy.

He got out of the truck. He acted a little slow and dazed, which seemed appropriate for a man who's been dead for 30 years. He looked good, though. Just like in the pictures.

Grandma rushed out of the house to greet him.

I can't remember what was said, or even if we embraced. I woke up before we could really get to talking.

It was a pleasant dream, if frustrating. It felt very real, but not real enough.

1 comment:

EJM said...

Its been a long time, but I used to have a similar dream about your dad. The details of where and the garden thing are different, but the anticipation and the arrival sound similar.

I did a lot of dream work some years ago, and a good question to ponder is 'what aspect of myself do each these people represent?' I've found it almost impossible to tease the answers out by myself (a good therapist who works with dreams is rare, but amazing), but I've found that dreams - at least ones with huge emotional content like this - are always true, and always true at several layers of meaning. But you're the only person who can really figure it out.